Transformation Alters Our Experience of Life Forever
Transformation produces sudden and dramatic openings in power, freedom, peace of mind and self-expression. If you’ve had a “breakthrough” experience in life, it probably occurs for you as an unpredictable, random phenomenon totally out of your control. However, it is possible to create the conditions in which transformation can readily occur.
Most individual and social development proceeds in a gradual, linear fashion. The vast majority of education as we know it, such as learning a new language or acquiring a new skill, provides this kind of incremental human development. We call this “progress” and we generally measure it on scales of “more,” “better,” and “different.” This is all good and valuable. But it is not transformation.
The French have a saying: Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose. (The more things change the more they stay the same.) We’ve all experienced this: in order to be happier, I get a different job, I buy a bigger house, I join a new club or I start a new relationship. Six months later I find I’m no happier. I imagine that altering the ‘content’ of my life will alter my experience of life, and in short order I am disappointed. Don’t get me wrong: changing and improving our circumstances is a natural and healthy aspect of living. But it generally doesn’t alter our experience of life forever. Transformation does that.
Context vs. Content
Transformation occurs in the context of our life rather than in the content. Context is the box that we are frequently instructed to “think outside.” However, most people haven’t been trained to pay attention to the box. We’re just in it like fish are in water. If you asked a fish “how’s the water?” the fish would have no idea what water you were asking about. Through the water, the fish perceives what is in the water: other fish, plants and occasional bubbles. But the fish doesn’t see the water. Yet the water makes all the difference in that little fishy’s life.
What’s the ‘water’ for human beings? The ‘water’ of human experience is comprised of the constructs that make up the world, as we know it. It has to do with the lens through which we view life and the way in which we relate to ourselves, to others and to life itself. (Forgive my mixed metaphors.) Context is less about what we know, and more about how we know or experience life and all its contents.
Context is Decisive
It’s easiest to recognize the power of context in the lives of people other than ourselves. It often appears dramatically in what we call “blind spots.” For example, you may have had a friend who has had a series of failed relationships. Perhaps you have noticed a pattern in these relationships and that the pattern links to your friend’s view of relationships (or to their view of men or women). Try as you might to intervene, your friend can’t see his or her role in perpetuating the pattern. That’s why it’s a “blind spot.” It is something hidden from view that shapes and limits one’s experience.
You might think of this hidden context as a perspective or point of view. It is sometimes called a paradigm. When transformation occurs, this context is altered. But, transformation results in more than a shift in perspective. To the extent that the hidden context puts constraints on one’s life and experience, transformation liberates one from those constraints. The result is a newfound freedom and power.
Life Beyond Limits.
Though people tend to lump it into the "personal growth" category, transformation is not about getting better, fixing anything that is "wrong" in life or "self improvement" of any kind. You could say that transformation is about what life is like (and what becomes possible) when we get beyond concerns for fixing, changing and getting better. At its most fundamental level, transformation leaves one with the experience of being whole and complete and being at peace with oneself and others. Paradoxically, this creates a new space for new (empowering and liberating) ways of being.
If you could transform your own "context" at will, it would undoubtedly empower you to transcend all kinds of limits and fulfill new possibilities in every area of your life. But, how does one gain access to something (context) that is hidden from view?
Many disciplines promise breakthroughs in self-awareness that bear a resemblance to what I'm calling transformation. Practitioners of various forms of meditation report these kinds of results--typically after years of dedicated study and application. Certain approaches to SMALL GROUP interaction have been reported to produce similar results--again this occurs after extended periods of diligent practice.
Knowing Doesn't Make Any Difference
In the 1980s, one of my college advisors, Kent Warren, taught me all about context and paradigms. He had studied with the guy who coined the term "paradigm shift," Thomas Kuhn (The Structure of Scientific Revolutions). Thanks to Kent's tutelage, I understood that I was a fish in water. Sadly, I never saw the water and I never experienced transformation. I was stuck with my blind spots. That wasn't a reflection on Kent. It simply illustrates that understanding about transformation doesn't produce transformation.
Years later the subject of paradigms came up in a conversation I had with a coworker at Disney. This coworker, Karl, who was something of a mentor to me, claimed that a three-day seminar had generated an abundance of paradigm shifts for him. Having attended many seminars in my life, I was inclined to disbelieve that a seminar could have any lasting benefit--much less a genuine paradigm shift. Nevertheless I could sense a distinct shift in Karl's manner of being. He had been very intense and seemed to have "lightened up." He seemed more comfortable and direct in his communication. He reminded me of someone who has a new love in his life. So, on Karl's recommendation alone (thank you, Karl), I registered to take the seminar myself. It was called the Landmark Forum.
Here's my recommendation to you: If your life could be enhanced by new openings and possibilities in the areas of power, freedom, peace of mind and full self-expression, consider participating in a weekend that will rock your world. Find out more at LandmarkEducation.com.
Here's more about my personal experience:
Three Days I'll Never Forget
I sat in a room for three long days (Friday through Sunday) with 150 strangers (and one old friend who coincidentally registered for the same Landmark Forum). On Sunday night I left quite uncertain whether I had the same experience as Karl. It was fascinating and even enjoyable. There were lots of laughs and I even had insights into my own life. But I witnessed so many dramatic transformations in other people during those three days and I wasn't sure there was anything happening on that same level in my own experience.
Monday morning I had a doctor appointment. I was about to learn the results of a kidney biopsy I had a couple weeks earlier. The doctor informed me that I had a kidney disease for which no treatment existed. He explained that they would continue to do tests over time to see whether my condition would remain stable or deteriorate (which would lead to dialysis or transplant). Then he explained that sometimes this disease is congenital (you're born with it) and sometimes it stems from other causes including rheumatic fever and aspirin overdoses.
I remembered that as a kid I used to sneak into the cupboards and eat baby aspirin like they were candy. Immediately a wave of emotion welled up inside of me. I felt a strange mix of shame and anger. I was doing my best to hide this inner drama from the doctor when something strange and wonderful happened. It was as if I was suddenly watching my own reaction. I was observing myself thinking and feeling and strategizing. With a flash of insight I recognized the pattern of it all. I watched my own mind making a judgment and berating me for my shameful behavior (the sneaky six year old eating the aspirin). Though the predictable course of that pattern would have resulted in "stuffing it" with silence, I found myself, instead, asking the doctor if I could have brought on this disease by eating baby aspirin. He explained it was not likely. I nearly burst into tears of joy. I suddenly realized that this pattern of self-flagellation ran rampant in my life and for the first time I nipped it in the bud effortlessly. What would have predictably led to days and weeks (and longer) of suffering and anguish had vaporized in an instant.
It was clear to me that this sudden access to my own "blind spots" was a direct result of my participation in the Landmark Forum. One of my closest friends, Lynn, had often tried to point out one of my blind spots: that I over-thought things and used my intellect to distance myself from people. As I shared this amazing process of transformation with Lynn and told her what had happened in the doctor's office, she interrupted me. Her attention had fixed on the part when the doctor said I might need a kidney transplant. She said, "Max, I want you to know that if you ever need a kidney, I'll be the first in line to give you one of mine."
Wow. That is an amazing thing for anyone to offer. Yet I almost missed it. When Lynn spoke, the conversation in my mind was dismissive of what she said. I was thinking something like "Lynn has no idea what is involved...it's a one in five thousand chance to find a match...it will never happen." Again, the Landmark Forum experience intervened as I witnessed the noise in my head in that moment. Catching myself having those thoughts gave me a chance to get present to what really happened. Then I realized that this dear friend had just offered me a body part and immediately I felt the impact of that loving gesture. It took quite a while to compose myself after that. This transformation spilled over into all my relationships. People saw it and commented how I had warmed up and opened up.
I've shared only one episode of my transformation. The amazing thing is that I continue to experience the liberating power of transformation in all aspects of my life. Landmark Education's approach to transformation is a discipline that continues to yield results years after I first participated in the Landmark Forum. And I have had the privilege of sharing the Landmark Forum with dozens of others who have all reported similar extraordinary results.
The program is presented with such impeccable integrity that I can unreservedly recommend that you participate at any time and anywhere in the world that the Landmark Forum is offered. Go to Landmark Education's website at LandmarkEducation.com for more information, to register or to find out where an introduction will be held near you. I don't get anything for recommending this program to you (not even a toaster!). Nevertheless, I'm eager to hear about your experience of transformation. So be sure and let me know all about it.
